What have I done so wrong that no one ever has done, to deserve all the treatment that I am facing today? Why is it that others can make bad choices and its fine and I cannot make wrong choices and not be ridiculed, criticized and judged for it? The others make them and don’t speak and hide it and I am the fool that speaks of it, face the mistakes and have to take all the judgments from these same people.
Dad was right, I talk too much but that is my character. I am harmless, not like some people. A husband that seems so calm, nice and sincere and that is what is perceived by the outsiders as being in control of things, yes, of his things only. This man has made so many mistakes over again and again and again, some of which I am aware of but many others that he has kept secret for fear of being judged. Well, I judge him because I am the only one who has lived long enough to know what he could possibly be.
EVERYONE SEES HIM A GOOD MAN, IS HE A GOOD HUSBAND? HE SAYS YES, WHAT DO YOU SAY?
He proclaims himself as the nearest-to-the-best husband any woman could have. Yes, he professes it in his defense because he needs to. A good man wouldn’t need to profess it because his wife and family will profess it. Now you judge for yourself if he befits this title.
DOG SHOW VS SON’S SHOW
He would spend his time to go to a dog show year after year, sometimes even a few times a year. He has never been to even one of his son’s activities, not one concert, not one sports day. It’s for the business, and that is justifiable.
NO TO EVERY BIRTHDAY
He hasn’t the time to take him to birthday parties or even attend his son’s birthday at school because of the business. It’s justifiable. He would go to his client’s events because it was business.
BROKEN HOUSE VS EMACULATE KENNELS
The curtains railings are falling off, the chair is broken and has been for now 10 months, the tv doesn’t work in house and he wouldn’t do anything about it. He would replace anything in the kennels and keep it well painted and renovated at any costs and at times borrowed costs, because it is for the business.
WIFE ALLOWANCE, GO GET IT YOURSELF!
He professes to give me 5,000 and let people think it’s for my spending. But its transition money, I do the paying for the household. It is his half of our past commitment of 8,000. He used to pay 4,000 and now because I do not work, and we have cut our commitments down, he needs to top it up by 1,000K and he has made me cry and explain myself to death for it over the past 10 months. From this amount, I don’t get even an allowance to keep my skin in tag. He said, that I should do all that I do for the love of the family. And if I want any more, I have to find it myself with work.
STAFF ALLOWANCE, SURE THING
For the business, he would increase his staff salary, he would let an ex staff take his money and not demand it back, he would house his friend’s STD son in a motel and shuttle the boy to the doctor’s to treat his STD. For whatever extra that the wife may need, she would have to beg for it.
TO VET FIRST THEN TO HUMAN DR.
I hear daily stories of his visits to the vets, of what the vet knows nothing of the dog’s condition and yet when his son is sick, he either doesn’t notice it until I say something or it has to wait until the kennels is closed before he is taken for treatment. The business is still first.
DOG DIET VS SON’S DIET
He knows what to feed the dogs and what not to feed the dogs to keep them healthy and yet, he feeds his son with KFC and complains that our once-a-week McDs is bad for him. He would buy 5 boxes of ice cream for consumption. Over the years, he still has to learn that his son cannot eat ice cream because he develops the cold cough and eating KFC doesn’t make it better!
DOG GROOMING VS WIFE’S HAIR KEEP
He takes his dogs for grooming when he thinks its hair is in bad shape but when his wife, who nowadays go to a backend cheap hairdresser, he blames her for changing her hair and wasting money! My hair cut costs 15 and his dogs’ haircut costs minimum 80! And he pays it forward and hopes the owner will repay him and if the owner doesn’t, he would have done it for the dog. It’s for the business! My perm is 50 and I style it differently BY MYSELF and he says I go to the coiffeur’s everyday!
GOES ANYWHERE ON HIS OWN
He takes his son out all the time, and don’t go out with us as a family because he says he can’t stand being with me. But at the least, could you not keep us informed where you are going? Let us know that you are KFC and asked if we could possibly want some to, since we are stuck home?
NO NOTICE
Can he at least tell us he was going to the mall and give us a choice, instead of just going and thereafter come home with his son and say, they went there. Can he not call to say he was at the grocers and if there was something we needed from home? Instead of coming home with bags and bags of stuff we didn’t need or didn’t want?
SARCASM IS THE WAY OF A LOSER HIDING HIS DEFEAT
Can he be less sarcastic so that we all don’t pick it up and start talking that way to everyone around us? I have so far not been too affected, I don’t use it when I am out with friends but hell, I use it on him, I have mastered it from the master himself. My daughter has been criticized by her friends that she is sarcastic. She wouldn’t dare use on me and when he is sarcastic to her, she just ignores him but she is retaliating by using it on her friends. And before long, when the son grows up he will also master it. Every damn thing that comes out of his mind and mouth is sarcastic. We were told to understand that that was the way he dealt with issues! And we have to learn to deal with it. So he gets to keep doing it and we have to suffer it? Huh? I am getting rid of the advisor!
WHAT IS AKA BAD INVESTMENT
He announced that he spent 25K a month ago. Please enlighten me. OK, I got 5K to keep the house going. Where on earth did the rest go to? Give it 10K to keep the kennels going (which is an exorbitant amount for the operations by my calculations.) What happened to the other 10K? Oh I forgot, to the business! I have yet not had the liberty to look into the expenses for the kennels but I can bet my life, he spends most of it on it. Tsk! Tsk! Everybody understands that because IT’S FOR THE FUCKING GOD DAMN BUSINESS!!!!!
He makes the money and ploughs it back it, so what the fuck money is he making? We do not improve our family life because he doesn’t do anything to keep the family going. He just wants to keep the kennels going! He makes more and more and we still have to live with 5K.
DOGS’ LIVES BETTER THAN HUMAN LIVES
I KNOW HE CAN DO IT, IF HE DOESN’T SPEND SO MUCH OF THE FUCKING MONEY BACK INTO THE FUCKING GOD DAMN KENNELS! He got some money sent from Spain for his sister’s visit last August and the balance unused, it went to the kennels for expansion. All the money he has ploughed back into the kennels, where is the extra income earned? Isn’t that called bad investment????? It has not improved our lives. It has improved the dogs’ lives! Soon I wouldn’t be surprised that the dogs will be living in air conditioned cages because of global warming! Oh, please don’t forget, it’s for business!
I PAY FOR DOG MEDS, YOUR FAMILY PAY FOR YOURS
He would pay the vet to treat his dogs, the numerous strays that cost more to feed than his family! And he told me to get my family to foot my medical bills because any extra has to go back to the business!
BEGGAR WIFE
I have yet over the years to receive anything from him without begging! I should consider professional begging. I should be quite good at it over the past year’s training.
IT’S NOT ANOTHER 9 YEARS, IT’S ANOTHER 5
I wanted to change the car so that we could improve just the little time that we share as a family better. The small car is already giving trouble and I have had to beg for money to fix it. I worked out a deal that he need not pay a fucking single cent more except that the loan is now stretched another 5 years and he went and fabled his way to my brother now convincing him that he cannot afford it! My brother doesn’t believe me and believes him! I am so disappointed!
NO ONE NEEDS TO PAY A CENT!
I did my brother a favor in putting the car in his name so that he could build up the No Claim Bonus discount pending his purchasing another expensive car which he couldn’t afford but its ok for him, mum will ok it because he is the son! But she wouldn’t ok, him applying for the loan for my car change because she thinks we can’t afford it. She bought him the Evo because he developed HBP and he was not working then! But that’s ok, it’s for the son!
FAVOR FOR FAVOR, LEAVE MY FAMILY BIZ ALONE
Doesn’t anyone understand that I did him a favor and I want the favor back now because the damn car is in his name! What a big mistake. And I want to right it this time so that this kind of shit doesn’t happen to me anymore. I cannot trust my family anymore.
I AM NO CHEAT!
Even my sister who offered to pay for my medical bills wanted a receipt for my doctor’s visit! What do they think I am, a fucking cheat????
ALL ARE REASONS, AND ALL ARE VALID, JUST DIFFERENT
Everyone else’s reasons are deemed valid and mine are always stupid! But really if you look into it carefully, mine are just different. As different as they are and as honest as it is, it is what I need to do, whether to force commit my husband to improve our living or our relationship. Can’t anyone see it that way? And even if it means it would improve my condition, what is so wrong in doing so? Why do all of you not help see it my way?
Why can’t anyone see me happy? Why do I always have to fight so hard to make myself happy? There isn’t anyone who loves me unconditionally, the one that did, died 5 years ago.
TO MY FAMILY
Hey, mum, bro, sisters, I have HBP too and I don’t get extras from my nearest-to-the-best husband and on top of that I have the other disorder too, can’t you support me by letting me do this? I AM NOT ASKING FOR MONEY!!!
TO MY NEAREST-TO-BEST HUSBAND
Which would you rather?
Pay for monthly maintenance of the old small car
Fight every time we go out in it because you and I are overlapping our bodies
Be prepared to buy 4 new tires as they are running thin (Min 600)
Battery is giving out soon (280)
I am not going to risk driving the car when raining because the car is skidding badly these days Car is too low to sail through floods
Pay road tax & insurance in January 09 (Min 600)
OR
Dad was right, I talk too much but that is my character. I am harmless, not like some people. A husband that seems so calm, nice and sincere and that is what is perceived by the outsiders as being in control of things, yes, of his things only. This man has made so many mistakes over again and again and again, some of which I am aware of but many others that he has kept secret for fear of being judged. Well, I judge him because I am the only one who has lived long enough to know what he could possibly be.
EVERYONE SEES HIM A GOOD MAN, IS HE A GOOD HUSBAND? HE SAYS YES, WHAT DO YOU SAY?
He proclaims himself as the nearest-to-the-best husband any woman could have. Yes, he professes it in his defense because he needs to. A good man wouldn’t need to profess it because his wife and family will profess it. Now you judge for yourself if he befits this title.
DOG SHOW VS SON’S SHOW
He would spend his time to go to a dog show year after year, sometimes even a few times a year. He has never been to even one of his son’s activities, not one concert, not one sports day. It’s for the business, and that is justifiable.
NO TO EVERY BIRTHDAY
He hasn’t the time to take him to birthday parties or even attend his son’s birthday at school because of the business. It’s justifiable. He would go to his client’s events because it was business.
BROKEN HOUSE VS EMACULATE KENNELS
The curtains railings are falling off, the chair is broken and has been for now 10 months, the tv doesn’t work in house and he wouldn’t do anything about it. He would replace anything in the kennels and keep it well painted and renovated at any costs and at times borrowed costs, because it is for the business.
WIFE ALLOWANCE, GO GET IT YOURSELF!
He professes to give me 5,000 and let people think it’s for my spending. But its transition money, I do the paying for the household. It is his half of our past commitment of 8,000. He used to pay 4,000 and now because I do not work, and we have cut our commitments down, he needs to top it up by 1,000K and he has made me cry and explain myself to death for it over the past 10 months. From this amount, I don’t get even an allowance to keep my skin in tag. He said, that I should do all that I do for the love of the family. And if I want any more, I have to find it myself with work.
STAFF ALLOWANCE, SURE THING
For the business, he would increase his staff salary, he would let an ex staff take his money and not demand it back, he would house his friend’s STD son in a motel and shuttle the boy to the doctor’s to treat his STD. For whatever extra that the wife may need, she would have to beg for it.
TO VET FIRST THEN TO HUMAN DR.
I hear daily stories of his visits to the vets, of what the vet knows nothing of the dog’s condition and yet when his son is sick, he either doesn’t notice it until I say something or it has to wait until the kennels is closed before he is taken for treatment. The business is still first.
DOG DIET VS SON’S DIET
He knows what to feed the dogs and what not to feed the dogs to keep them healthy and yet, he feeds his son with KFC and complains that our once-a-week McDs is bad for him. He would buy 5 boxes of ice cream for consumption. Over the years, he still has to learn that his son cannot eat ice cream because he develops the cold cough and eating KFC doesn’t make it better!
DOG GROOMING VS WIFE’S HAIR KEEP
He takes his dogs for grooming when he thinks its hair is in bad shape but when his wife, who nowadays go to a backend cheap hairdresser, he blames her for changing her hair and wasting money! My hair cut costs 15 and his dogs’ haircut costs minimum 80! And he pays it forward and hopes the owner will repay him and if the owner doesn’t, he would have done it for the dog. It’s for the business! My perm is 50 and I style it differently BY MYSELF and he says I go to the coiffeur’s everyday!
GOES ANYWHERE ON HIS OWN
He takes his son out all the time, and don’t go out with us as a family because he says he can’t stand being with me. But at the least, could you not keep us informed where you are going? Let us know that you are KFC and asked if we could possibly want some to, since we are stuck home?
NO NOTICE
Can he at least tell us he was going to the mall and give us a choice, instead of just going and thereafter come home with his son and say, they went there. Can he not call to say he was at the grocers and if there was something we needed from home? Instead of coming home with bags and bags of stuff we didn’t need or didn’t want?
SARCASM IS THE WAY OF A LOSER HIDING HIS DEFEAT
Can he be less sarcastic so that we all don’t pick it up and start talking that way to everyone around us? I have so far not been too affected, I don’t use it when I am out with friends but hell, I use it on him, I have mastered it from the master himself. My daughter has been criticized by her friends that she is sarcastic. She wouldn’t dare use on me and when he is sarcastic to her, she just ignores him but she is retaliating by using it on her friends. And before long, when the son grows up he will also master it. Every damn thing that comes out of his mind and mouth is sarcastic. We were told to understand that that was the way he dealt with issues! And we have to learn to deal with it. So he gets to keep doing it and we have to suffer it? Huh? I am getting rid of the advisor!
WHAT IS AKA BAD INVESTMENT
He announced that he spent 25K a month ago. Please enlighten me. OK, I got 5K to keep the house going. Where on earth did the rest go to? Give it 10K to keep the kennels going (which is an exorbitant amount for the operations by my calculations.) What happened to the other 10K? Oh I forgot, to the business! I have yet not had the liberty to look into the expenses for the kennels but I can bet my life, he spends most of it on it. Tsk! Tsk! Everybody understands that because IT’S FOR THE FUCKING GOD DAMN BUSINESS!!!!!
He makes the money and ploughs it back it, so what the fuck money is he making? We do not improve our family life because he doesn’t do anything to keep the family going. He just wants to keep the kennels going! He makes more and more and we still have to live with 5K.
DOGS’ LIVES BETTER THAN HUMAN LIVES
I KNOW HE CAN DO IT, IF HE DOESN’T SPEND SO MUCH OF THE FUCKING MONEY BACK INTO THE FUCKING GOD DAMN KENNELS! He got some money sent from Spain for his sister’s visit last August and the balance unused, it went to the kennels for expansion. All the money he has ploughed back into the kennels, where is the extra income earned? Isn’t that called bad investment????? It has not improved our lives. It has improved the dogs’ lives! Soon I wouldn’t be surprised that the dogs will be living in air conditioned cages because of global warming! Oh, please don’t forget, it’s for business!
I PAY FOR DOG MEDS, YOUR FAMILY PAY FOR YOURS
He would pay the vet to treat his dogs, the numerous strays that cost more to feed than his family! And he told me to get my family to foot my medical bills because any extra has to go back to the business!
BEGGAR WIFE
I have yet over the years to receive anything from him without begging! I should consider professional begging. I should be quite good at it over the past year’s training.
IT’S NOT ANOTHER 9 YEARS, IT’S ANOTHER 5
I wanted to change the car so that we could improve just the little time that we share as a family better. The small car is already giving trouble and I have had to beg for money to fix it. I worked out a deal that he need not pay a fucking single cent more except that the loan is now stretched another 5 years and he went and fabled his way to my brother now convincing him that he cannot afford it! My brother doesn’t believe me and believes him! I am so disappointed!
NO ONE NEEDS TO PAY A CENT!
I did my brother a favor in putting the car in his name so that he could build up the No Claim Bonus discount pending his purchasing another expensive car which he couldn’t afford but its ok for him, mum will ok it because he is the son! But she wouldn’t ok, him applying for the loan for my car change because she thinks we can’t afford it. She bought him the Evo because he developed HBP and he was not working then! But that’s ok, it’s for the son!
FAVOR FOR FAVOR, LEAVE MY FAMILY BIZ ALONE
Doesn’t anyone understand that I did him a favor and I want the favor back now because the damn car is in his name! What a big mistake. And I want to right it this time so that this kind of shit doesn’t happen to me anymore. I cannot trust my family anymore.
I AM NO CHEAT!
Even my sister who offered to pay for my medical bills wanted a receipt for my doctor’s visit! What do they think I am, a fucking cheat????
ALL ARE REASONS, AND ALL ARE VALID, JUST DIFFERENT
Everyone else’s reasons are deemed valid and mine are always stupid! But really if you look into it carefully, mine are just different. As different as they are and as honest as it is, it is what I need to do, whether to force commit my husband to improve our living or our relationship. Can’t anyone see it that way? And even if it means it would improve my condition, what is so wrong in doing so? Why do all of you not help see it my way?
Why can’t anyone see me happy? Why do I always have to fight so hard to make myself happy? There isn’t anyone who loves me unconditionally, the one that did, died 5 years ago.
TO MY FAMILY
Hey, mum, bro, sisters, I have HBP too and I don’t get extras from my nearest-to-the-best husband and on top of that I have the other disorder too, can’t you support me by letting me do this? I AM NOT ASKING FOR MONEY!!!
TO MY NEAREST-TO-BEST HUSBAND
Which would you rather?
Pay for monthly maintenance of the old small car
Fight every time we go out in it because you and I are overlapping our bodies
Be prepared to buy 4 new tires as they are running thin (Min 600)
Battery is giving out soon (280)
I am not going to risk driving the car when raining because the car is skidding badly these days Car is too low to sail through floods
Pay road tax & insurance in January 09 (Min 600)
OR
Maintenance free for min. 3 years, service and parts for the new car
Road tax and insurance covered in purchase of car
No quarreling about being squashed
No need to pay extra every month (BTW, you are not paying another 9 years, you still have to pay for the small car another 4 years, so you are actually only paying another subsequent 5 years!)
For the comfort of your family
For my sanity
For once do it for the family instead of the BUSINESS!
I JUST WANT TO CHANGE A BREAKING DOWN CAR FOR A NEW ONE, NO ONE NEEDS TO PAY ANYTHING, I AM NOT ASKING FOR MONEY, JUST A SIMPLE APPROVAL TO DO SO......WHY MAKE IT SO HARD...............THE CAR IS JUST TOO SMALL FOR ALL OF US AND WE WILL BE SPENDING MORE MONEY TO HAVE IT FIXED MONTH TO MONTH, WASN’T THAT WHY YOU CHANGE YOUR SMALL CAR WHICH HADN’T EVEN RUN AS MUCH AS MINE HAS....WHY THE HELL DO I HAVE TO EXPLAIN SO MUCH TO GET SO LITTLE????? CAN’T YOU SEE THAT THESE COSTS CAN BE SAVED WITH THE NEW CAR??? CAN’T YOU SEE THAT IT CAN IMPROVE OUR OUTINGS? WE FIGHT ALL THE TIME NOW, BECAUSE WE ARE SO SQUASHED IN IT. CAN’T ANYBODY SEE SOME GOOD OUT OF ALL THIS? WHY ARE YOU ALL TORTURING ME??
FOR ONCE, CAN IT NOT BE FOR THE BUSINESS? CAN SOMEONE JUST SAY YES WITHOUT PUTTING ME THROUGH HELL!
I don’t have a husband that loves me, why can’t you guys just love me???
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